I had a problem with a neighbour when I was in the city. Well, he had problems with me too, but his tactics weren't at all direct and drove me wild.

After talking with my lawyer to check my legal responsibilities in the situation I talked to a community relations outfit in the police department. They referred me to a community organisation that provided conflict resolution services. Basically, the organisation contacts all parties to agree to accept mediation services and provided a panel of experienced mediators.

I imagine the mediation takes various forms but ours required us to write out a description of the problem and both appear together before the panel to present the problem. The panel prepared a summary in the form of a non-binding contract that was signed. I agreed to do some things and so did my neighbour. We both gained something but neither of us entirely got our own way.

I can't say the services rendered us buddies or anything, but the mediation did manage the problem and likely far better than a legal route. The big thing is that you appear before the panel and the other party alone--no hired mouthpieces and arcane legal stuff to muck up a solution. The trouble with legal routes is that then tend to produce one winner who is judged 'right or damaged' and one looser who is judged wrong. The real world is seldom that clear.

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